General People Descriptions

I got this from a work colleague, really funny. Ever been called any of these, well maybe I haven't, but quite often I feel like number 14.

1. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.


2. Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.


3. A room temperature IQ.


4. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold them together.


5. A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.


6. A photographic memory, but the lens cover is glued on.


7. A prime candidate for natural de-selection.


8. Bright as Alaska in December.


9. One celled organisms out score him in IQ tests.


10. Donated his body to scientists... Before he was done using it.


11. During evolution his ancestors were in the control group.


12. Fell out of the family tree.


13. Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.


14. Has two brains, one is lost and the other is out looking for it.


15. He's so dense, light bends around him.


16. If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.


17. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.


18. If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you get change back.


19. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.


20. It's hard to believe that he beat 100,000 other sperm.


21. One neuron short of a synapse.


22. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just gargled.


23. Takes him 1.5 hours to watch "60 Minutes".

I did remove a couple as I felt they were too 'other' country originated, as I didn't understand them.. perhaps thats me just being number 17 though !
Enjoy.